Navigating Travel Friendships: When Connections Shine or Sour

Advertisement Opinion Making new friends overseas can be great – or go totally wrong Sue WilliamsContributing writer January 20, 2026 — 5:00am January 20, 2026 — 5:00am You have reached your maximum number of saved items. Remove items from your saved list to add more. Save this article for later Add articles to your saved list and come back to them anytime. In 1983, China had the most bitter of winters – an icy minus 12 degrees in Beijing – and it seemed everyone had streaming colds. The only other overseas tourist on the train from Xian to Beijing, a Mexican called Emilio, was no different. He gave me a wan smile as he settled into his mound of blankets and tissues as I passed his carriage, and we agreed to share a taxi, on arrival, to a dormitory hotel in the city. But when the train finally arrived, there was no sign of him. He’d apparently been taken off on a stretcher and whisked by the American embassy (in the distant days when they also looked after Mexicans) to hospital. I visited him daily, taking him food and water, as neither were supplied by the hospital – nor the embassy – until one day, his bed was empty. My heart stopped, until I was told he’d been flown home with advanced pneumonia. He’d left me a letter on the bedside cabinet, with his address, home phone number, effusive thanks and an invitation to visit whenever I was near. Advertisement Three years later, I was in Mexico, so I wrote and then visited. He was obviously pleased to see me, and his family was strangely gushing. It was only when I was later alone with his brother Mateo that the truth came out. He told me how pleased everyone was that Emilio finally had a fiancee, and when we were planning the wedding? It can be truly wonderful meeting fellow travellers on your trips who you think are like-minded people and with whom you can share some of the most incredible sights, explorations and experiences. But sometimes everything isn’t quite how it seems. On holiday, they can be fun and fearless and infinitely agreeable, but back home they might have values, outlooks and motivations that are incredibly different to one’s own. Once, in Botswana, I spent a couple of weeks bumping into a young New Zealander called Gus. Our routes were similar, as were our ideas about what we wanted to see, and we always enjoyed each other’s company. Advertisement When I was next in New Zealand, I drove to Gisborne to stay a few days at his place with him and his girlfriend. She was lovely, but he’d morphed into an overbearing, horribly aggressive heavy drinker she was obviously frightened of. I left the next morning. I’ll never forget the Sydneysider, either, I’d befriended in Venezuela who’d run out of money when I was living in London. She came to stay – and vanished one day with half my wardrobe. I still miss those purple cord pants. But, of course, there are always the people you do encounter on your travels who turn into much-treasured, lifelong friends. I met two lovely Melburnians in the Kimberley whom I relish seeing regularly. I’m still close pals with a Londoner I travelled with through Central Africa over 40 years ago. And when a New Zealand woman I met on that first trip through China became seriously ill years on and needed a kidney transplant, I wouldn’t have hesitated to give her one if I’d been a better match. Advertisement Making great friendships with others exploring the world is one of the true joys of travel and can add immeasurable pleasure to any trip. Then, if they sometimes go wrong later, hopefully it’s a small price to pay. Because, far more often, they do turn out beautifully and while it can take effort to stay in touch, those reminiscences over treasured shared times provide the foundation of something even more meaningful. I’m still in contact, for instance, with Mateo in Mexico, although politely declined the invitation to Emilio’s wedding. You have reached your maximum number of saved items. Remove items from your saved list to add more. More: Travel tips Opinion Sue Williams is a Sydney-based freelance travel writer, author and journalist who's filed for newspapers, magazines, radio and TV stations around the world.Connect via email. Traveller Guides